Sometimes in this strange, wonderful phenomenon of sharing called blogging, it can be all too easy to put another person up on a pedestal, to assume they are leading a nearly perfect life because of the snapshot that we see – the carefully chosen words, the edited Pinterest worthy photos.
While I choose to focus on the light and the joy and the happiness here at Simple Kids, I do strive to keep it real. I write honestly about my struggles and my short comings.
But just in case some of you sweet, misguided souls think that my family and I are perfect, I hope to happily and humbly burst your bubble today.
In the spirit of humility, reality, and true tales from life in the trenches, for today’s Friday Five I offer 5 of my most humbling parenting moments.
After all, if I can’t laugh at myself, well, then I’d probably spend a lot more time crying.
1. The $98 library fine.
Yes, friends, you read that number correctly. Nearly $100 in late fees and lost materials accumulated over nearly two years delivered to us in one embarrassing library visit a few weeks ago. Gulp. And you thought I was so organized.
Our small town librarian is super sweet, not the kind to give you the stink eye at all. But, I swear there was that record scratch sound when the amount was announced and the whole library looked at us with a mix of horror and pity (Okay, not really. But it sure felt like it). Amplified by my eleven year old saying, “whoa, mama!”
Jillian would like everyone to know that this is why she has her own library card.
2. I stink at potty training.
Folks who find out I have a blog about parenting often ask me for potty training advice. Friends, I have no advice to give. When and IF my kids make it out of diapers, it is due to their own ingenuity and intelligence and not that of their mother, I can assure you.
One of my children was not fully potty trained (as in no interest whatsoever in being out of diapers, thankyouverymuch) until … well, until they were old enough that it made people uncomfortable to see them in a diaper.
My oldest potty trained herself at 22 months (while we were on a cross country road trip, no less). I naively took that to mean that I knew what I was doing. However, it must have just been her personality because with each child, potty learning is taking longer and longer to accomplish successfully.
Becoming a proficient potty user happens when each of my children is ready, and not a moment before then (despite my efforts, bribes, and character endorsed potty seats).
At this rate, Amelia will be out of diapers sometime around her 12th birthday.
“If at first you succeed – try to hide your astonishment.” – Los Angeles Times Syndicate
3. The “Biter”
I find myself, once again, the mother of that toddler. You know the one. The kid you speak about in hushed tones during play group and try to steer your tender-fleshed children away from at family get-togethers.
No doubt this is karma paying me back for all the times I commented on the public behavior of a child or trash talked someone’s parenting before I become a mom myself. (We try to shadow her and we take this behavior seriously, we really do, but she’s a quick little piranha.)
Parents of The Hitter, The Pooper, The Screamer, The Nudist, and The Pincher, I sympathetically join your ranks in the play group shame circle.
4. Why Christopher and I get nervous when we hear Lucy playing Ring-around-the Rosie.
Overheard at our house recently,
“Ring around the rosies,
pocket full of posies,
aw sh*t aw sh*t,
we all fall down.”
Unfortunately, upon further questioning it came to light this was not a charming mispronunciation, as I had hoped, but was in fact the proper use of the swear word.
Mother of the year award committee, I expect you’ll be passing me by for 2013.
5. While I write these words, this is what the laundry pile behind me looks like:
And I fully intend to keep on ignoring it until the weekend.
“Laughter shared is laughter multiplied. I love to laugh, and I love those I can laugh with.” – Beth Wilson Saavedra
Okay, I’ve laid out my humiliations here. Does anyone else have something to share? Preferably about your own parenting and not, ahem, mine. (Pretty please?)